Mongoos150

I’m here at the lake. It’s so beautiful. I used to come here when I was little, I have all of these memories tied up in the smells and sights of northern Indiana. I miss LA terribly - but it’s very peaceful here. If only I had a decent internet connection I’d be happy

I’m also coming to the United Kingdom in less than two weeks and I’m so so excited. I’m hoping to do some exciting youtube/stickam/blogTV projects once I have a good, fast reliable internet connection. I was thinking of being live as much as I possibly could the first day I get to my flat, which would be amazing… maybe? Or dumb? I just want to do something original  and fun. A “friend” was telling me how Glasgow wasn’t a very nice city, high crime etc… which put me in a sour mood. I think it’s a lovely place, great Uni, friendly people. Urgh. Parade rainers FTL.

Hello everyone (to the whole… 10 people that read this?):

So I’ve just been thinking / observing about myself and money… I mean - my career path isn’t exactly lucrative. It can be, but for most, it isn’t. Also, even though I am a smart and capable individual, who gets As in school and has managed several successful internships, I’m sort of on a path to financial struggle. I’m going abroad in 3 weeks (I can’t believe it’s this soon, wow) which is putting me in an even bigger heap of debt.

When I get back from Scotland, I might do another internship in LA, but realistically, I won’t be able to afford to move back to such an expensive city. I’ll go back to Tucson, find two jobs, try to buy a cheap car and start paying back my loans. I don’t feel like I was cut out for a life of financial struggle. Besides the whole “having expensive tastes” thing, and growing up around wealth that I didn’t have, I strive for success in my life. I always have, and financial success is a big part of that. I don’t need or want to be fabulously wealthy, but I want to live comfortably enough to have a beautiful home, a nice car / clothes, and be able to vacation. I want a comfortable life. Nothing extravagant. Too much to ask for? I really hope not.

I wish I knew how to better monetize myself, I suppose. I’ve thought about what I have to offer that others don’t have, I don’t have a quick/simple answer. I don’t want to change my major, I’ve invested myself too far into media to turn around. I’ve thought about pursuing something different while keeping up with my media pursuits, which sounds pretty good, but I’m not sure what I could do.

I feel like maybe I should’ve just gotten a business degree, and then an MBA. Even though I love media, I love what I study, it might not be lucrative enough. Should one really just study what makes them happy, with disregard to how they’ll do financially? Surely not. With the economy doing so poorly, maybe it would’ve been the logical idea. I could still go to graduate school and get an MBA. I just may do that. The idea of studying math (even though it’s not a whole lot of math) makes me cringe. It’s my one subject I’ve always done poorly at. I suppose I’ll look into it more, maybe get a GMAT study book. What would I do with an MBA in media? I’ve no idea. I feel lost.

In other news, we are leaving Florida tomorrow and flying back to LA. We got upgraded here at the resort to a corner suite, it’s beautiful, like a small apartment. I was planning on filming my question response video tomorrow, so you’ll likely get to see the room in that video tomorrow. Love you all. <3

They do.

Also, I’ve changed my YouTube layout (will change my blog site later) to represent something simpler and more directed to the style I’d like to represent in my future videos. Hope you all like it.

So everyone knows I’m leaving LA on August 12th to go back to Tucson, then I’m flying to Indiana on the 16th to visit my grandma on her lake, and then I fly to Scotland on September 12th. Right? You knew that, right? So anyway instead of staying in my apartment with Marrisa (read: ice queen from hellz), Kaz’s family offered to let me stay with them until I move. So I am going to be living there for two weeks! Hoorah. I actually just moved my TV into the back seat (the 40″ LCD) which was interesting on my own, almost fell once, but it’s in the back seat in one piece. I’ll drive it over later today, hopefully it won’t get stolen from my back seat (this neighborhood is a bit seedy).

Also, I just did laundry and had to break a $5 bill just to get 50 cents. Grrr.

Soooo I’m starting to really dread leaving LA. Kaz and I have been together (”officially”) for just under 5 weeks. Not a terribly long time, but long enough for us to grow adequately attached to each other, long enough for it to start hurting. Not that I’m going to go on an emo sadness self-pity rant, but I’ve really grown attached to him and find myself growing sad thinking of leaving Kaz for a year (or more). His mom texted me tonight, wondering why I wasn’t joining the family for dinner, and she said I was like part of the family and that she had truely enjoyed getting to know me. Aweeeee

It totally figures that when I find someone I really really like - with an awesome family that I click with - I have to leave and uproot it all. I’ve always gotten on well with the families of people I’ve gone out with, but Kaz is my first boyfriend, the first person I could (in a way) see myself with down the line - anyway, it’s just a bit disheartening and I hope things will work out for us long term. Hope everyone’s had a fantastic week, Tuesday is my last day at E!, and then I fly up to SnowBird on Thursday

Just got Beck’s new album! I’m a big fan, been listening since I was in 5th grade. Anyone else have opinions? So far, on the 4th track, it’s great! Seems quite a bit more mellow than The Information.

Was at the red carpet premiere of Meet Dave last night. It was pretty cool, lots of fans behind the police lines, so I got to walk the red carpet and look important! Kaz and I were completely underdressed, but oh well. It was funny. The movie was better than I thought it would be! The promotions dept. for the movie needs to be fired. Also, got to see Eddie Murphy in a huge crowd, so that was cool.

In other news, MTV emailed me about casting for their new friday night show F’N MTV. Apparently it’s like a music video commentary thing, where people pop on screen talking about the video or artist. Who knows if it’ll go anywhere, I still haven’t heard anything about the Engine Room casting. Hope everyone is having a wonderful week!

Has anyone seen this musical? It’s a Broadway show that’s won Best Musical, I’m going to see it in two weeks with Kaz and his mom downtown at the Ahmanson Theatre! I’m really excited!

Hope everyone had a great holiday! I went to an amazing beach party in Malibu, had a fantastic dinner with the boy and fam, watched fireworks and saw Wall-E. It was great, I really dug the political message, and the film itself was beautiful. Hancock, on the other hand, was mediocre at best. Let me know in the comments what you all did this holiday (or not, if you’re not a yank)

Today Kaz and I went down to Melrose Ave and did a bit of shopping, thrift store rummaging and general buggery humbuggery. There was also a strawberry malt from Johnny Rockets thrown somewhere in there, and riding electric scooters through his neighborhood. Yay! Yesterday, we went ice skating and had dinner with about 16 of his friends in B. Hills (at California Pizza Kitchen, which is pretty much awesome). Tomorrow’s agenda includes Pinkberry and sock shopping. Also, I filmed a Society of Nar video with Kaz, and we made a NAR board!